It’s a little late to wave you goodbye, but it’s human nature, we ignore the footstep of someone’s walking away until they are gone. Yesterday my friend asked how you were. ‘WERE’, right and then the reality smashed my face that now I am left only with unsaid confessions. I replied her ‘good’ with a curve on my lips. Sometimes it amazes me that how we human can hide so much chaos of our mind with a simple smile. She got busy with some other talk without realizing that she has just knocked the ‘don’t touch’ door of my brain and now my own thoughts are dragging me inside. ‘GOOD’ this is the understatement of the century I guess. Maybe I should have told her you were the one responsible for my gut-wrenching pain, for my tear stained pillow, for my numbed body. Because of you I cried continuously for days and days. You gifted me heartbreak wrapped in a shining velvet paper. Because of you l lost a few of my close friends, few daggered me, few have to leave of compulsion, but you have created the circumstances which lead them to do. You divested my job and added cherry to the cake of my misery. I remember the day I welcomed you in my life with a huge celebration, I had so many expectations from you but you abandoned me whenever I needed you. Because of you I questioned my identity and capabilities, filled me with self-loathing and constant rage. And for all these things I want to tell you, is a big “THANKYOU”. Yes, you heard me right. No, neither I am drunk nor being sarcastic. You have no idea how grateful I am to you. Before you I was a girl living in her own virtual world, totally dependent on others who used you got worried on every second thing. All my naive illusions flee, now I am the same girl amassing all my broken pieces by my own. I survived the days when it felt impossible to do. You made me realized that the things or people I am mourning over never belonged to me. That job was not something I was passionate about or I didn’t succumb so easily. People who left me never loved me enough not to leave so why I am stupid enough to shed even a drop of tear for them. Have you heard of that saying ‘the people who have nothing to lose are the strongest’, you snatched everything from me and made me one. The pills you gave weren’t easy to swallow, but yaa those of yours antibiotics not only cured my diseases, but also made my immune system stronger than ever. There was a time I didn’t even know how to get out of my bed and face another day and today I am here not only breathing, living my life to the fullest, chasing my dreams. Today I am happy and the best part is this happiness lies within me so it’ll last as long as I’ll and trust me this realization is the best feeling ever. We were together for 365 days and that’s quite long period, Now that you have been gone forever and there is no turning back, I want to confess that I am not holding any grudges against you, in fact, I’ll miss you and whenever I will think about you, about us I’ll always end up smiling. Yes my dear 2017, I’ll always love you because you have made me love myself.



20 thoughts on “ADIEU

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